…when someone in the group seems to be sabotaging the group’s experience?

• If during the workshop this person continues to impact the experience of the entire group it is perfectly ok, and perhaps necessary, for you to take a break and speak to this person privately. Remind them of their personal expectations for the workshop. Ask if those expectations are being met and, if not, how can you both work together to make that happen. Also clarify your responsibility to the group and their safety and expectations. Remind them that this is a group experience and if things don’t seem to work in this format that it might be best for them to leave and you will be happy to discuss this further after the workshop.

• This last tip is for those of you who may be more advanced. If you feel that the energy of someone is negatively impacting the group, redirect that energy by letting them know how you feel, I.e. “I am feeling anxious about the group energy or dynamic. I feel some tension and negativity. Is it just me?” Then ask the group how they feel. This does two things; takes the focus off of the potential ‘saboteur’ and takes care of the group dynamic by giving participants an opportunity to give voice to their concerns and validate their feelings. Just make sure they talk about how THEY feel, not about anyone else. This is an opportunity for people to own their feelings in a safe environment. It is also about naming the elephant in the room—or horse as the case may be!, creating congruence. Remember, in EFL, congruence is absolutely necessary for safety!

You never know when someone will be triggered by their vulnerability around the horses, so it is best to expect that this might happen. Most importantly, you must ask yourself before the workshop, “Do I have the appropriate training and skills to handle this type of situation?” If you aren’t sure, ask a colleague or mentor. I am always here to give you an objective ear!